Disrupting my thoughts came, Andrew’s voice, “Penny for your thoughts.” “Agh,” I sighed, “I was just thinking about how we use to decide if we were going to walk or ride our bikes, so we didn’t outnumber Alexander every time. A sad smile crossed his face at the memory. At that moment we both took a deep breath and locked eyes. My breath caught in my throat, as he swept his hand gently over my face and ran his fingers through my hair. For just a second, I thought he was going to kiss me, and oh, how I longed for it. However, the oven timer went off, letting us know it was time to check the fresh baked goods we were making for our picnic. Andrew quickly withdrew from me and shifted his attention to the cookies in the oven.
Meanwhile, I took a moment to clear my head and take a few deep breaths to calm my nerves. I decided I wasn’t going to try to analyze what just happened, or rather, what didn’t happen. I was determined to keep a clear head and just let things unfold naturally. I snooped over Andrew’s shoulder, taking a peek at how our chocolate chip cookies were coming along. Sensing me there, Andrew smiled and asked, “Would you like to taste test a cookie with me?” I nodded my head eagerly as the tantalizing aroma of freshly baked cookies wafted up my nostrils making my mouth water and my stomach rumble. Andrew handed me half a warm and gooey chocolate chip cookie, and I eagerly took a bite, closing my eyes and sighing in pure delight.
I opened my eyes to find Andrew watching me, his facial expression quickly shifting to an elaborate smile of chef appreciation. This time I definitely saw a blush settle across his face when I caught him watching me. Maybe I just caught him off guard, maybe he felt a little embarrassed, or maybe I wasn’t imagining something more than friendship happening between us. Was it there before and I overlooked it? Was it a new layer of bonding over the loss of Alexander?
I fell in love with my sweetheart when we were both just still friends. Moving out of the friend zone and into a serious committed relationship can be scary because you don’t want to lose the friendship that you cherish, but it’s simply painful to ignore the call and longing of love in your heart.
Our heart is a wonderful tool that tells us what is true to each and every one of us, but opening up our heart to new opportunities can be downright scary as there are no guarantees things will work out well in the end. The question you have to ask yourself is the risk worth it? We have to be willing to move outside our comfort zone and take risks that may have wonderful rewards waiting to make our hearts sing and bring us the happiness that we long for.
Ask yourself today what fears are standing in my way of happiness?
© Jenna Gee
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